Walking Out on The Girls: A Matter of Sperm


Exit stage left.

These were pretty special women. They were researchers, lawyers, social workers, academics, and others. All were bright, compassionate for their cause, and pro active.  I met women from all over the world who would make great dinner companions or friends.

So why leave my group?  Kvetching, kvetching, kvetching.  Bitching and whining and oh, how non PC I am to say this of my female friends.

What were we doing together? Working to get action in the court system for abused women and children.  So far so good. But their answer was always the same: men are the problem, always, all the time, never not, don't disagree, this is it, I know it for a fact.

Oh please. Cry me a river and build me a bridge. Men are not always the problem.  Some men.  Some times. And those are the ones we are bringing our respective talents together for.  Or so I thought. Until I saw it wasn't that way at all.

Every newspaper article about a man killing his wife and or child was sent to the group. A discussion was had as to the necessity of men as fathers.  Sperm was the only necessity. It would be so much easier to either sperm bank a kid or, as some would prefer, go to Europe, slut around,  get pregnant and come home, not ever able to trace parentage.

There you go, they think. Now it's easy to raise a kid - no daddy, no marriage, no divorce, no custody battles. Oh ye of little wisdom.  Oh, you selfish ones.  Oh, this is all about control, this is all about you, and not at all about the baby, the child.

When little Susie or Sammy wants to know who Daddy is and you tell the enchanting story of Mommy as heroine who went to a sperm bank or ten men in ten countries tour of Europe, and expect undying gratitude, don't be shocked when they rear their independent little head and scream: "How dare you, bitch? Who do you think you are to deny me half my parents? Half my background, genes and family history?"

I predict one day there will be the Selfish Mommy Gene Bank Analysis Computer Program. Children made for mom alone will donate their DNA and in the world wide data bank, another will respond. He may just be a DNA Daddy, but it's more than they thought they'd have and less than they should have.

"It's a wise man who knows his father" the saying goes and a wise woman who lets her children know. When women mimic the selfish manipulation they see in men it's time to put the cart in reverse and see which turn we took,  and failed to see,  was labeled Wrong.